Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Letter Fourteen

At last you have come to your senses! A rampage, the best way to make your name known and feared throughout the land! But I advise you not to stop at Aolia, it is a tropical place, and it would take far too long for the story of your infamous attacks on their crops to reach the ears of other provinces.
You would do best by traveling from the burning Aolia and come to my provinces; Borgard is a rich place, with many duke’s castles and farms to terrorize; Sandemar is a sheep land, which would be best fit for snacks and the occasional sheep-bombing of towns (it never fails to send the humans screeching from their houses).
The best strategy would be to burn a few of the larger towns, killing everyone but making sure there is a nice tall smoke trail, so to bring horrified farmers to the scene.
Eat them all! Then kill them! Then hoard them! Perhaps not in that particular order...
But now onto the most crucial part of your rampage, your title and name: Smok, if I may be so blunt, is a feeble and weak name (I have no idea why your deluded parents gave you that horrid name). But I have thought on this, and have come up with a few well-chosen titles.
Gerdrex the Dastardly, a strong name, liable to strike fear into the minds and hearts of the filthy humans, especially in Borgard
Sygorax the Scoundrel, a rogue like name, liable to quickly fly through travelers from town to town until your name is feared in every land; except perhaps Yovi, those fops are nothing but drunkards and mindless idiots.  
With this in mind, you shall go far, though not as far as your esteemed uncle (me, of course) has.
Your Incredible, fearful, ferocious, terrible, fear inducing, omnipotent, clear minded, outspoken, infamous, wel speld, humble, most modest uncle

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