Thursday, July 5, 2012

Letter Eight


It has come again to my attention that your over stuffed uncle Scaligar has sent you a long letter which in every word insults me, tells lies of my hoard, and sneers at my hoard. But you can tell him that I could not care less what he thinks about me, for I do not pay attention to his pathetic attempt at desecrating me, for he is a no-good, fat-bellied, to smart-for-his-own-good imbecilic moron.
But I must defend something, I DO have a diamond throne, it just got cracked and I had to put it in storage! And I do have a collection of golden knight’s helmets, I just put them in an enchanted chamber, then I realized that I did not know anything about...
But on to your mentoring; I have found that repossessing is a masterful way of swelling your hoard, though I have made mine great by killing kings and taking there treasure as tribute, but for a lowly dragon like yourself, repossessing is a good way to begin your hoard, and after a few years of my mentoring, you might come up to my standard of terror-inducing evil overlord of three provinces.
I trust that you have killed your parents already in a most horrific and brutal fashion. I will be checking up on you in the next few days, but for now, my wrath remains quiet.
Your ferocious, incredible, fearful, terrible, need I mention omnipotent and modest uncle,

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