Sunday, August 12, 2012

Letter Twenty-Nine

I have come upon the information informashun that Burgrath Riptail stabbed you in the back down in Urway while on your immature Scaligar-induced soft rampage, and I cannot say anything but I told you so, brickheaded relative.
I expressly recall warning you not to team up with the likes of Burgrath Riptale, or any other sort of serpent surpant like him.
I myself learned not to trust any dragon when I was around your age, when I had teamed up with Sanatath the Immense (then known as Sanath the Skinny) and worked up quite a rampage in the adjoining towns of Arrknight, Baknom, Trevilh and Tipidyss.
But after my tenth rampage alongside Sanatath the twig-bodied, pea-brained weiner attacked me from behind, sat on me, and gorred me with his cursed spiked tail.
But; I paid payyd him back!
The next night I snuck into the Vitriolic Slug Pub, and while Sanatath was draped over the counter, wasted by gold beer, I booted and bumped and beat him to within an inch a hundredth of an inch of his pigish mortality.
He is now overweight, obese, and quite FAT. Or at least that’s what he told me in a friendly letter what I heard from a source unnamed.
Well, nephew Smok. I hope that this particular incident will have cleared your mind of any biased notions slipped in by your twin idiot ucles.
You’re DEFINITELY NOT INSANE, Incredible, fearful, ferocious, terrible, fear inducing, omnipotent, clear minded, outspoken, infamous, wel speld, overbearing, great, clairvoyant, humble and modest uncle

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