Thursday, September 13, 2012

Letter Thirty-Nine

We the authors of the blog apologize for the misposts. We hope it never happens again. That said, please enjoy Letter Thirty-Nine.


My dear Smok,
It has come to my attention that you have accepted the king’s job. Good.
Please do not follow Semithino.
I have a source, Kreedack the Tracker, who says the rogue dragons you are attempting to track are hiding in a nicely disguised cave in the side of Mount Merridan. A very nice piece of real estate, it is hidden behind the Frostuay Falls. But be careful, from Kreedack’s description, it is well armed.
Please do not follow Semithino.
There is a team of six dragons altogether; one of them, fairly large, is the brawn of the group; from Kreedack’s description I believe that he is Ardung the Mangler. He shall be the toughest match of all in strength, but his brain powers are seriously lacking.
Please do not follow Semithino.
There are two twin black dragons, who appeared to Kreedack to be the very infamous Infernox sisters. Be wary of those two; though they are slightly smaller than you, they are nimble, swift, and cunning, and they never leave each other’s side, making them very difficult opponents.
Please do not follow Semithino.
The fourth appears to be a skulker; that is, a small weakling dragon with almost no fight in him but who is a master of camouflage and disguise; he scouts out good spots to hit. If you can spot him, then he shall be an easy target. His name is Minox the Diminutive.
Please do not follow Semithino.
The fifth is about your size, and he seems to be about equal to you in every respect. In fact, I regret to inform you, Smok, that it is Burgrath; yes, indeed, your old partner who left you with a long jagged scar to remember him by.
Please do not follow Semithino.
In my experience as a dragon I have found revenge to be a great motivator, but always remember: it is a dish best served cold. When you kill Burgrath, you must make him suffer and regret his betrayal, begging for mercy before you finally give him mercy by finishing him off forever.
Please do not follow Semithino.
The sixth is a mastermind dragon, of about the size of the Infernox sisters. Be wary of him; he never leaves the lair, but instead tends to the numerous booby traps inside. That’s right, booby traps. So you can’t go rushing into their lair while they’re asleep and slit their throats. This dragon is named Pellicor the Mastermind.
Please do not follow Semithino.
I would advise you to get Ardung the Mangler alone, then drop several large boulders on him from above, killing him and making it look like an accident. If you can get him with Minox, even better; since Minox is small, he will not add to the threat level if he and Ardung see you.
Please do not follow Semithino.
That is all my advice for now; once you have killed Ardung or if there is an emergency, please write back and I will tell you what to do next.
-Your serpentine uncle,

P.S. Please do not follow Semithino.
P.P.S. Please do not follow Semithino.
P.P.P.S. PLEASE do not follow Semithino.
P.P.P.P.S. PLEASE DO not follow Semithino.
P.P.P.P.P.S. PLEASE DO NOT follow Semithino.

1 comment:

  1. "Please do not follow Semithino."

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!! These are hysterical.