Sunday, September 15, 2013

Book Two Letter Thirty Three

My Dearest Nephew,

 I think I may be dying. As I lie here on my deathbed, I ponder over the things I have done over the course of my life and I begin to question certain choices I made both as a younger Dragon and as I grew older and became slightly more responsible and wise and all tha
Ignore the sentence above. I made more than one attempt at writing this letter is all and after a while the nurses here at the house of healing I am currently bunking in refused to give me more sheets of parchment after I crumpled up and burned my 36th attempt. The nerve!
            Anyway, I am in a hospital at the moment, thanks to your uncle Scaligar’s ungrateful behavior, but I am getting ahead of myself.
            It started when I came to rescue him and that Drakess from their icy demise on the frozen tundra, wait, no, it really started when your father Rorfang married your mother and we met for the first time. I shall never forget that day, what fireworks there were and there weren’t even supposed to be fireworks at your parents’ wedding! But anyway, telling the story of my injuries at your uncle’s hands from there would take a very long time.
            I set out from the refueling station where I had questioned the Drakes about the location where they had marooned your uncle Scaligar and the Drakess, intending to do my best to rescue them. Seeing as I would be all but blind and totally unable to locate your uncle in the blizzard by sight, I decided to put the ol’ elemental Pearl to use and turn to forces of nature to help me along my rescue quest.
            I influenced the blizzard around me to locate your uncle Scaligar and concentrate itself around his position. A brilliant plan, eh? If your uncle and the Drakess sheltering with him from the storm did not die of cold and exposure too soon, I would be sure to find them and rescue them.
            When I found your uncle after a few hours of searching through the blizzard, I descended in magnificent Draconian glory (don’t believe a word of this crashing headfirst into the snow thing your uncle Scaligar fabricated)
            At first your uncle and the Drakess seemed quite happy to see me and Scaligar ran to me and fell upon my neck and wept and told me he was sorry for all of the terrible things he had done to me over the years and that he would clean my cave and do my laundry for the rest of his days in penitence.
            I accepted his apology gracefully and said to him “Let us kill the fatted turkey and roast it, for my brother has apologized for all of the heinous crimes he has committed and has said that he shall do my laundry…”
            Very well, none of that actually happened although your uncle did seem glad to see me right up until I told him how I had made the storm stronger around him to find him at which point he began to inflict upon me the injuries that put me into this house of healing.
            After he had sent me flying into the snow after a triple spin punch and a wackerdoodle tail kick and I had spent my last reserves of breath quipping “You’re welcome” YOUR UNCLE SCALIGAR PROCEEDED TO USE MY ELEMENTAL PEARL TO MANIPULATE THE STORMS AND SEND THEM AWAY!!!!!!!!!!! MY ELEMENTAL PEARL!!!!!!!!!!!!

            [Note: this letter was sent without a signature as it had to be taken from the possession of the patient by the name of Semithino in ward 7 as he appeared to have deteriorated into a state of frothing fury and had to be led away to quiet room for a series of deep breathing and yoga sessions lest he hurt somebody.
            Sincerely, Hurkek the Extremely Notorious for Cutting off Limbs, head of the Northern branch of the Draconian hall for the Full Recovery of Health and Peace of Mind]


  1. . . .
    I think more than just Seminitho's body's been injured by this . . .

    1. Agreed. He was soon after transferred to a room made entirely of styrofoam and lacking any sort of sharp objects.